(Posted 2025 November)

Screen time is a concern for many parents in our Parenting Education Programs’ classes. Across all socioeconomic levels, racial groups, and ages, the prevalence of phones, iPads, and computers has made it challenging for many parents to effectively limit their children’s screen time. 

This issue reached a tipping point in several local public school systems this year resulting in a ban against students using cell phones and other internet connected personal devices (earbuds, AirPods, smart watches, etc.) during the school day. This is an effort by educators to create a less distracted and more engaged and relational learning environment. 

In addition to being a distraction from schoolwork, excessive screen time can negatively impact children’s sleep habits, levels of fatigue, and mental health. Two of the key findings in the Data from the National Health Interview Survey–Teen were that during July 2021 through December 2023, one-half of teenagers ages 12–17 had 4 hours or more of daily screen time (50.4%).  Secondly, “about 1 in 4 teenagers with 4 hours or more of daily screen time have experienced anxiety (27.1%) or depression symptoms (25.9%) in the past 2 weeks.”

So how can parents help their children spend less time online? 

First of all, there’s no single way that today’s teens go online. According to the Pew Research Center, December 2024, “Teens, Social Media and Technology 2024” survey, “most teens have or have access to a smartphone (95%), desktop or laptop computer (88%), gaming console (83%), or tablet computer (70%) at home.”

Easy access to online technology in a child’s pocket, backpack or bedroom invites them to spend time on their devices throughout the day and night. 

Helping your child to become less dependent on online tech requires discipline and intentionality on the part of parents and caregivers to set limits and enforce them — but how?

Delay introducing smart phones and tablets until children are older. Allow younger children to explore and play with age-appropriate, hands-on toys. Let them mature and develop healthy routines and habits before introducing screens. 

Encourage your child’s participation in sports, clubs, or other extracurriculars to help them have positive alternatives for their time and attention. When kids have too much unstructured time, they are tempted to fill it with screens.

One of the biggest predictors of a child’s screen time usage is their parent’s screen time according to a recent study. Children are watching and taking mental notes on your habits. If you don’t want your teens to check their phones during dinner, then you should keep yours tucked away. 

Parents can fall into the trap of “multitasking,” but what suffers? It may seem efficient to quickly answer a work email, order the batteries that just ran out, or book a doctor’s appointment while trying to listen to your child, but splitting your attention impacts your ability to fully hear and understand your child. 

Before you pick up the phone, consider if the response can wait. If you are with family for an event or even just to share a meal, think about whether replying to that text is urgent or if your time would be better spent in the moment. 

Avoid turning attention from your kids to your device. This can make your children feel like what is on your phone is more important to you than they are. This can hurt their feelings and damage your relationship. If you need to use tech during time with your kids, explain to your child what you are doing in the moment, so they understand the interruption.

Think about the time you spend online and if it’s truly useful. If your sleep is upended for the week by bingeing the latest show on Netflix or you find yourself mindlessly falling down a social media rabbit hole too often, then you might want to use an app to set limits on your own devices as well as your kids’.

Keep devices out of the bedroom. Having your phone within arm’s reach of the bed is a recipe for disaster in the form of late-night scrolling or early morning delays. Set up a phone/tablet charging station in a central location for everyone in your home to store devices overnight. Keep all gaming systems, laptops, and TVs in a central location such as a den to limit access. 

Ban devices from certain activities. Mealtimes, driving, homework time, bathtime, bedtime, are all activities when phone use could be dangerous or disruptive to you and your children, so put them away. You can also confine devices to specific zones of your home to limit the places and times in which your family can interact with them.

By rethinking your own relationship with devices, you can begin to establish family-wide norms that can help your children and teens to have a healthier relationship with tech.