Discover simple and effective ways to bond with your young child.

By Sara Winston, Youth Services Manager, Woodrow Wilson Library

Raising Them Right

One of the most important impacts we can have within our society is who we raise our children to be. As expressed in a recent study out of the University of Connecticut’s Department of Human Development & Family Sciences, growing into mentally healthy adults begins with the security gained from bonding with parents and other family members as infants and toddlers. While this can seem like an overwhelming task for caregivers, it can be broken down into simple, small things that have big impacts. 

Baby Steps to Success

Bonding is one of the first concepts we in library youth services focus on with babies and their caregivers. According to the book Mindful Parenting in a Chaotic World: Effective Strategies to Stay Centered at Home and on the Go, creating an emotional bond with your child sets them up to form other healthy relationships and builds a secure attachment with their caregiver. Begin by thinking about eye contact. How often do you make eye contact with your child while talking to them? Doing so shows them they are important and helps them learn to do the same for others. 

Another easy way to bond with your child is to tell them everything you are doing as you do it. For example, while putting away clean dishes look at your child and say, “I’m putting the plates with the other plates. Now that the plates are together, we can find them easier for lunch.” This exercise will also help with vocabulary building and teaching about the work we do for ourselves and others. It may take longer to complete tasks this way, but the bond it helps you form with your child will last a lifetime.

Learn (and Laugh) More

Starting down the path to long-term benefits for your child, stronger family bonds, and, in the larger picture, a better society, doesn’t have to be complicated or scary — just begin with these achievable everyday goals. But, if you ever do feel overwhelmed and stressed about raising a happy, healthy human — or if you just want a good laugh and some empathy — I recommend reading Go to Sleep (I Miss You): Cartoons from the Fog of New Parenthood by Lucy Knisley.

For additional reading on the importance of and ways to enhance bonding with your child, check out Play Anything: The Pleasure of Limits, the Uses of Boredom, and the Secret of Games by Ian Bogost and Theraplay^® – The Practitioner’s Guide by Vivien Norris and Dafna Lender.