(Posted 2024 December)
In July 2021, Elizabeth* and Daniel* received a call to take in a 10-month-old boy who had been separated from his biological parents due to mental health and substance use issues. Both Elizabeth and Daniel had previously taken care of foster children in their home and provided love and support, and happily welcomed this child in their home.
Elizabeth and Daniel actively continue to do weekly visits with his maternal grandparents and family. Although the grandparents were unable to care for Jesse* full time because they had Jesse’s older sibling in their care already, they wanted to maintain a connection and bond with their grandchild.
Finding an Adoption Placement
With the department coming to a team decision for Jesse’s goal to be changed to adoption, the practitioner worked on finding relatives who would be able to provide permanent care for Jesse. After many attempts and calls with relatives, there was no success finding a permanent home with a family member.
Practitioners spent many hours on calls, video conferences, and in family meetings discussing the needs of Jesse as well as the importance of biological connections for children. However, there were no family members that were able to provide permanency for Jesse.
After many conversations of transparency, Elizabeth and Daniel happily began the process of adoption for Jesse.
A Change in the Plan
With no progress being made by the parents over the year that Jesse was in foster care, the department made the difficult decision to move towards termination of parental rights.
Elizabeth and Daniel stepped in and were open to adoption of Jesse, whom they had grown to love after being placed with them. Elizabeth and Daniel had expressed their motivation for becoming foster parents because they want to be a connection to a child. They also want to be additional support and provide care for a child during the hardest, most vulnerable period of their lives. It was important for them to foster a connection with Jesse’s biological family while building a positive relationship with them as well.
Elizabeth and Daniel were willing to adopt if no family members were able to. They were aware that family members were still being contacted for potential care, but they were willing to become a support for Jesse, even if it was decided that he would not be staying in their home. They also wanted to make sure to maintain that connection, so Jesse would grow up learning how much he is loved.
Elizabeth and Daniel knew it was important to maintain the siblings’ relationships even if they are not in the same home. They leaned on their natural supports and were able to build a strong, trusting relationship with Jesse’s older brother, maternal grandparents, maternal aunt and paternal aunt. Elizabeth, Daniel and Jesse see his biological family weekly and take summer vacations together.
Although it had to be difficult for Elizabeth and Daniel to imagine Jesse leaving their home, they were prepared for the possibility of saying goodbye if a family member was able to provide a permanent home. Ultimately, due to the connection that Elizabeth and Daniel had built with the grandparents and other extended family, the family as a whole decided that they wanted Elizabeth and Daniel to adopt Jesse.
Jesse’s case had many ups and downs, but despite those obstacles, Jesse has achieved permanency and maintains bonds with his biological family. The foster care worker’s countless hours working with all the family members as well as this adoptive family’s strong commitment to Jesse led to a positive outcome in a safe, stable environment for Jesse.
*Names changed to protect confidentiality.
This article posting is part of the Foster Family News monthly newsletter designed to keep foster parents informed about all the new and notable happenings in Fairfax County.
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