Article by Mary Lee, Department of Family Services
(Posted 2025 November)
Caring for others has always been at the center of Rubina Jawiad’s life. She believes that when someone is in need, you reach out, because one day you may need a hand. That lesson was planted in her childhood by her father, a physician who treated the poor with dignity and often reminded his children to share what they had – even their toys – with sick children. To Rubina, caregiving is not a profession or a duty; it is a calling of the heart.
It was in this spirit that she first encountered Catherine at a local shelter more than ten years ago. Catherine was enduring one of the darkest seasons of her life. Her health had failed, her independence was gone, and her hope was slipping away. She had nowhere else to turn. No family would take her in, and the shelter was the only place left to keep her safe. Yet even there, despair weighed heavily on her. In hopelessness, she contemplated ending her life. Because her needs were complex and the shelter offered only limited clinical support, they could no longer safely accommodate her due to their safety policies.
Rubina remembers watching her walk out. “I couldn’t let her go like that.”
That evening, she spoke with her husband and two sons about Catherine’s situation. Inviting a stranger into their home was not an easy decision, but Rubina reminded them that they had space to offer, and Catherine had no place of her own. “How can we turn her away when she has nothing?” she asked. Her family, knowing her heart and her deep conviction, agreed. With their blessing, Catherine came to the Jawiad home the next day.
The beginning was not easy. Catherine carried deep fear and trauma from her years of homelessness. She had been assaulted and now lived in constant fear of strangers, especially men. Even inside Rubina’s home, she avoided neighbors, recoiled from new situations, and often trembled at night, unable to sleep. Depression hung over her like a heavy cloud, filling her days with silence and her nights with tears. She doubted her own worth, questioned whether she deserved a safe place, and often worried she was a burden.
Rubina met those struggles with patience and devotion. Many nights she sacrificed her own rest, sitting beside Catherine in the dark, holding her hand, whispering comfort, and praying with her until the trembling eased. She reminded her, again and again: “You are not alone. You are safe here.” Sometimes progress was as small as stepping outside for fresh air or sharing a simple meal together, but for Catherine, those moments felt like climbing mountains. Rubina encouraged her to greet neighbors, coached her through the daily fears that came with ordinary interactions, and stayed by her side through each setback and success.
But as the days passed, it became clear that love alone would not be enough. Catherine needed reliable support for food, medical appointments, and daily expenses – resources that one family could not shoulder on their own.
That is when help arrived. Through Catherine’s social worker, the family was introduced to Fairfax County’s CARES program (Community Adult Residences with Empowering Support). CARES is Fairfax County’s Adult Foster Care program, which helps adults who cannot live alone move into private homes where they receive daily support such as room and board, individualized nutrition plans, medication reminders, transportation and personal care in a safe, family-style environment. To make this possible, households that open their doors as providers receive financial compensation through Virginia’s Auxiliary Grant program, making long-term caregiving sustainable for both sides.
County staff assessed Catherine’s eligibility for the program and ensured she could receive support through the Auxiliary Grant and guided Rubina through the provider certification process, helping her complete training, home inspections, and background checks so that she could be formally approved to care for Catherine. This way, Rubina and her family were not navigating the journey alone but had the structure and support of the CARES program behind them.
With CARES in place, Rubina’s care for Catherine became more stable and sustainable. County staff checked in regularly, offering guidance, encouragement, and connections to appropriate resources. Their support meant that daily expenses and health needs were manageable, and Catherine felt reassured that she was not a burden on Rubina alone; there was a program and a county system committed to her well-being. This freed Rubina to focus on the personal side of caregiving – preparing meals Catherine enjoyed, bringing her to doctor’s appointments without worry, and knowing that help was always available when challenges arose.
Over time, the family’s bond with Catherine deepened. When she injured her leg and could not independently transfer from bed to wheelchair, Rubina’s two sons came home from college to move her safely to get to her appointments. When her phone broke, one of them bought her a new one without hesitation, eager to keep her connected. As the years passed, Catherine celebrated milestones alongside them – welcoming a new grandchild into the family, sharing in the joy of everyday life, and even helping to care for the little one. She was no longer just a guest in the household but part of the family’s story.
Perhaps the most meaningful milestone came when Rubina helped Catherine reconnect with her daughter after years of separation. With Rubina’s encouragement, Catherine began reaching out with letters and small gifts, taking the first steps to rebuild a relationship she thought was lost forever. Eventually, her daughter came to visit, staying several days. Mother and daughter shared meals, conversations, and laughter that Catherine thought she had lost for good. “That was the best thing that happened,” Rubina reflects. “Her own child gave her strength no one else could give.”
Now, more than a decade after that first night at the shelter, Catherine still faces challenges, but she is no longer alone and has the confidence of stable, consistent care. “Before, I was lonely and had no one to talk to,” she says. “Now I live in a supportive home. Rubina and her family are my friends. They lift me up when I feel down.”
Rubina, too, feels transformed. “I was able to give her security, but she also gave me trust and love,” she says. “Together, we found new life.” The journey also shaped Rubina’s children, who grew up alongside Catherine and learned what it means to care for someone with compassion. Today, one of her sons has decided to follow in his mother’s footsteps and become a certified CARES provider himself, opening his own home to care for someone in need.
Catherine also hopes others will take heart from her experience. “It is not easy to ask for help,” she admits, “but if you need it, please do. There are good services, and there are good people in Fairfax County who will help you. I am very lucky I found this program.”
As we celebrate National Family Caregivers Month this November, Rubina’s story reminds us that caregiving is not just an act of kindness, but an act of courage and community. It begins with a choice of the heart – but it is sustained by programs like CARES that provide the structure, resources, and hope to make that choice last.
Fairfax County’s CARES program is more than housing. It creates family-style homes where older adults and adults with disabilities can live with dignity, safety, and belonging. Residents receive support with meals, personal care, and community activities, while providers receive training, financial assistance, and ongoing guidance from county social workers. Together, they form relationships that enrich both sides.
To learn more about becoming a CARES provider or about services for yourself or a loved one, call the Fairfax County Aging, Disability and Caregiver Resources line at 703-324-7948, TTY 711 or visit FairfaxCounty.gov/familyservices/older-adults/cares-program.
This article is part of the Golden Gazette monthly newsletter which covers a variety of topics and community news concerning older adults and caregivers in Fairfax County. Are you new to the Golden Gazette? Don’t miss out on future newsletters! Subscribe to get the electronic or free printed version mailed to you. Have a suggestion for a topic? Share it in an email or call 703-324-GOLD (4653).