Welcome to the 2022 April issue of Volunteer Voices, a monthly newsletter for current and potential Domestic and Sexual Violence Services (DSVS) volunteers.
In this Issue:
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Hello, Volunteers!
I am Debra Ranf, the Community Engagement Services team supervisor. I oversee several programs: the Volunteer program, the Hospital Accompaniment program, Outreach and Youth Education and the Crisis Line unit. I know what you are thinking: It is a lot! Yes, but I have a strong team and I also have strong support from my manager.
A snippet about myself: I am from Barranquilla, Colombia, a coastal town in the northern part of the country. I have two grown daughters, Daniela and Laura, and my adorable Yorkie, Jack (and a husband to whom I have been married for 40 years!). My family and I relocated to the United States 20 years ago, but sometimes it seems it was just yesterday. While adjusting to my new opportunity in life, I started to value even more my upbringing and my colorful culture — colorful in every way, believe me. My family and I took this opportunity to learn a new way of life, to enjoy all the experiences that we encountered every day, to embrace the new culture and to be proud of being bi-cultural. It was not easy, but what good thing does not need effort to overcome challenges?
I worked at Artemis House (former Fairfax County Women's Shelter) as a therapist for nine years. It is there I learned about domestic violence and the services the county provided. I loved the work, the clients, the field, and my co-workers. Even though it was a fast-paced environment, we found time to enjoy moments with clients, their children, and with each other.
At the shelter is where I also started to learn about volunteerism in a more meaningful way than what I had learned in my country. I remember the volunteers arriving with books for each child to keep and read to them on a weekly basis. I was amazed by their compassion and commitment; this made me value their passion to help others much more. This motivated me to volunteer at the Whitman Walker organization as a group counselor. This experience gave me perspective and knowledge about this population, but more so about the significance of volunteering in the U.S.
DSVS volunteers, I value your commitment and the time you devote to help accomplish DSVS’s mission.
Debra Ranf
If You Do Nothing Else Today ...
Cultivating Seeds of Equity and Justice
Scavenger Hunt!
Do you like scavenger hunts? Do you want to test your knowledge? Do you want a chance to win a $25 Amazon gift card by deciphering clues? Well, here’s your chance.
To synthesize understanding of themes presented in the 2021 (January-December) editions of “Cultivating Seeds of Equity and Justice,” we have assembled below nine fun questions to test your knowledge. Good luck! (Send responses to Tanisha Cox.)
We are honoring our volunteers and donors at an evening of celebration during our second annual Volunteers & Donors Appreciation Event. You are crucial to the work we do, and we could not support the community without you. This is our chance to say: Thanks so much!
Thursday, April 28, 2022
6-8 p.m.
This virtual event is free, but you must register (password: WMd4bjK2=$). If you have questions, please contact Tanisha Cox.
“We live in a world in which we need to share responsibility. It’s easy to say, ‘It’s not my child, not my community, not my world, not my problem.’ Then there are those who see the need and respond. I consider those people my heroes." - Fred Rogers
Each newsletter will include this section to help share reviews, spotlight the people who support Domestic and Sexual Violence Services, recognize birthdays and list upcoming trainings and meetings.
Ashiyanaa--Serving South Asians
For more than 30 years, Ashiyanaa has provided culturally sensitive interpersonal violence support and services to families with origins in the South Asian countries of Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Bhutan, India, Nepal, Pakistan, and Sri Lanka and now living in Virginia, Maryland, and the District of Columbia. Some of their services include safety planning; referrals to legal, medical, counseling, educational and community resources; and short- and long-term case management.
Fire Shut Up in My Bones
Jazz trumpeter Terence Blanchard’s opera, “Fire Shut Up in My Bones,” which opened the Metropolitan Opera season last fall, made it clear it was time to revisit the memoir upon which the opera is based. New York Times columnist Charles Blow’s Fire Shut Up in My Bones (2014) lovingly recounts Blow’s journey from poverty-stricken and Jim Crow Louisiana to the respected and talented writer who became, at 25, the Times’ youngest columnist.
With writing at times both lush and heart wrenching, Blow paints a picture of his hometown and the loneliness he felt as the youngest of five boys so vividly readers can smell the magnolia and honeysuckle in the air and feel the corrugated soil of the makeshift family garden beneath their feet. But Fire Shut Up in My Bones is more than a story of poverty and racism. It’s a tale of how the strong bonds of family, love, and respect shaped a young boy into a man. It is the ode of a self-described Mama’s boy to how his mother’s fierce protection and determination reveal her preternaturally quiet son’s gifts.
Equally important to this tale is the betrayal and sexual molestation by a favorite cousin and the attempted molestation by an uncle when Blow was a child. The trauma scars him, causing him to question himself and his sexuality. In what is starkly familiar language to intimate partner service providers, he describes believing he had done something wrong, especially because one abuser was someone he admired.
Blow also doesn’t shy away from sharing his own missteps. After surviving brutal beatings while pledging a fraternity during his freshman year at Grambling State University, the abused becomes a leader within the cruel brotherhood and participates in hazing younger pledges himself. Though his childhood abuse isn’t connected to the hazing, Blow realizes he has to process the harm done by both in order to start healing.
By book’s end, Blow has stopped “running like the river … and just be the ocean, vast, deep, and exactly where it was always meant to be.” He has learned to let go of the rage left by his childhood sexual abuse and forgive those who hurt him, along the way realizing it would not be accurate to blame his abusers for his sexual identity. It is through this memoir that Blow comes to terms with a seldom-discussed topic: the oft-misunderstood notions of nonlinear sexuality.
Fire Shut Up in My Bones is a lyrical, profoundly moving memoir that takes readers on a stunning journey, leading them to a place of peace.
This article was written by Kendra Lee, Department of Family Services communications specialist.
Meet Wendy Werner, ADAPT Volunteer
"I have been a volunteer for many years. I was a reading mentor for elementary kids, medical support for a Susan B. Komen’s Breast Cancer Walk, and walked in various Suicide Prevention walks, among other things. I have volunteered with Fairfax County Hotline since 2017 and the ADAPT program since 2019," says Wendy Werner, ADAPT volunteer. "If I can help even one person make a positive change in their life, then I did my part in making the world a better place." Read more of Wendy's volunteer journey.
Nikita Dickey, 1
Ruchi Pandey, 1
Danielle Fein, 4
Debra (Debi) Carmel, 5
Isatu Kaloko, 10
Leigh Claypool, 12
Maci Nordone, 23
Ubaid Saleem, 24
Kim Hamlett, 27
Tier Two: Exploring Consent, Boundaries, and Healthy Sexuality with Clients Impacted by Intimate Partner Violence
Tuesday, April 19, 2022
10 a.m. – Noon
Conversations about consent can be difficult, even for professionals who work with individuals, families, and communities impacted by intimate partner violence. However, we know these conversations are often crucial in supporting meaningful change in the lives of the people we serve and preventing sexual violence. This training aims to support and enhance your professional skills regarding how to engage with clients about consent, boundaries, and the connections to healthy sexuality. This training is free, but registration is required.
Managing Trauma Triggers
Thursday, May 12, 2022
1-2:15 p.m.
One of the most debilitating impacts of experiencing trauma are the triggers left behind. These can range from eliciting disturbing thoughts, memories, and feelings experienced during the traumatic event to full-blown flashbacks. Triggers immediately change the body and brain functioning. This presentation will discuss how a trigger works, and how it affects the body and brain. We will also discuss how these triggers can be managed and/or modified. This training is free, but registration is required.
What kind of trainings are you interested in taking? Send your ideas to Tanisha Cox.
Thursday, May 19, 2022
6:30-8:30 p.m.
- Grief & Loss: what it is and how it impacts intimate relationships.
- Self-Disclosure: often well intentioned, at times can pose boundary and other concerns. When is self-disclosure harmful and when might it be helpful? Let's discuss!
Please take a moment to log on to your Volunteer Management System (VMS) account and log your hours for the month of March. Please also log any time you spent on training under “volunteer training.” If you do not see this selection under your opportunities, please email Tanisha Cox, and she will log on to add it to your account.
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Please enter your hours for each day you volunteered and not as a lump sum.
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If you need to log hours for a previous month, please email Tanisha Cox to let her know so she can be aware of the entry and expedite the approval process.
Check out past issues of Volunteer Voices.